Single dads can have a tough job in the dating scene. As they struggle to juggle work, access to their children and having a successful relationship that suits, there are many things to appreciate in a single dad that can often be overlooked. Without further adieu, our updated “Top 5 Reasons to Date a Single Dad“:

5. Single dads choose mates wisely.

Whilst searching for a suitable mate, from the off the single dad has to consider whether this person would be good for their children. Any suitable mate will need to display loving parental tendencies and a willingness to connect with his children. A single dad will search for a friend for his children, as well as a partner for himself. Only serious applicants need apply and the very fact that he has chosen to take you out on a date shows that he has taken consideration into how you will fit into his life.

4. He can appreciate a relationship.

Having lost an important relationship with the mother of his child, the single dad will have history and experience with dealing with relationships. He will understand the need for communication and affection, how relationships can break down without the basic needs being met.

3. Children show you how to have fun.

Children love to play, as such, the single dad will have to know that time is precious and to make the most of it! Entertaining children can be difficult but the single dad will be up to the task. He will create loving memories filled with laughter and fun. Who wouldn’t want to enjoy this man’s company?!

2. Children show you how to love.

Having children can be a life changer for many. The bond you share with your child; hits you like a steam train and rarely leaves your heart. The single dad will come to appreciate this love and learn how to show affection through raising his child. Enjoy the cuddles and kisses as the single dad has lots of practice in giving them!

1. Children make you grow up fast!

It is true, many boys love their toys; and some happen to grow up that little bit later than girls. However, having children has the ability to grab you by the scruff of neck and drag you into adulthood. Any single dad worth his salt will have his priorities in place. His children will be a huge part of his life and as such, will show a maturity to him that may be wise beyond his years. If commitment is what you seek, the single dad will not run in the opposite direction, cowering in fear!

The single dad has much to offer. He’s had to grow up quickly, gain financial stability to support his child, learn how to love, laugh and play; and show that he cares from afar. You can tell a lot by seeing a man with his child, his nature on full display as he interacts with the important people in his life. For the right person, the single dad has much to give, as he has learnt how to love and importantly, how to show it.

About the Author:

Matt Hughes has worked in the online dating industry for several years and understands how nervous it can be to start dating. For more information on joining a dating website, visit Lovestruck.

Photo credit: Viewminder via photopin cc

In 2002, ABC released what would soon become an all-out obsession: The Bachelor. America looked on as one handsome man narrowed down a pool of 25 beautiful women to find his one true love. One year later, The Bachelor’s sister show, The Bachelorette, was born. Then, in 2010, when fans thought it couldn’t get any better, Bachelor Pad was introduced. Today, whether you’ve been following from the very beginning or you’re a relatively new fan, chances are you don’t miss an episode… ever.

What’s with this obsession?!

People who can’t stand The Bachelor really can’t stomach even one 10-minute segment before the next commercial break. On the other side of the fence are fans who not just love the Bachelor shows, but who blog and Tweet about them live. These are the fans who become “friends” with Bachelor participants on Twitter; who send them care packages long after their season is over; who get into online fights with other fans over who the prettier or snobbier Bachelorette is.

It’s funny, because…

…The Bachelor and The Bachelorette almost never work. Fans of the show are no longer interested in watching the guy or gal of the season find their one true love. Instead, they want to see the relationship crash and burn once the new couple has made the talk show rounds. The fallout proves to be more interesting – and more telling – than the show itself.

That’s terrible – people celebrate other people’s unhappiness?

Well, yes, but it’s not as bad as it sounds. The Bachelor and The Bachelorette do an excellent job at presenting the most perfect parts of the star of the show. You see the guy’s toned abs and the girl’s flawless manicure. You see them be sweet, sincere, honest, open and lovable. What you never see are their terrible qualities or even their realness in a day-to-day, humdrum setting. That’s why so many people tune in via social media even after the show’s over – to see everything they missed.

Unattainable Dating: the Essence of Reality TV

The Bachelor and The Bachelorette do an excellent job at showcasing the most perfect components of dating. Idyllic settings and amazing activities are all pre-arranged. The “contestants” and the audience don’t see anything other than the limo, the once in a lifetime experience and the champagne toast that follows. Even the inevitable breakups are the best you could ask for, with the bachelor/ette kindly and patiently explaining their feelings. The competing guys and girls aren’t always show in the best light, but the star of the show is, right along with the unrealistic dating scenarios.

This is all interesting and lovely to watch and lust after, but it’s not exactly reality TV. ABC must have recognized this opening, because Bachelor Pad seems to do the opposite of its relatives. Former cast members of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette come together to live, play and compete in the infamous mansion during the other shows’ off-season. Instead of showcasing refinement and glamour, you see the flip side of everyone you grew to love on their previous shows. Put together, all three Bachelor shows deliver everything we could possibly want.

About the Author:

Charlie Peyton is a TV addict who likes to keep upto date with new technology. He writes on these subjects for TV blogs. Find out how you can get direct TV on www.expertsatellite.com

One of the things I struggled with the most after my divorce and subsequent single parent status was trying to maintain a work-life balance for my son and myself. It’s so easy to get caught up in one aspect of your life as your priorities change.

For me, the challenge was bridging the gap between being a dad and being a successful provider to my son. I struggled with the amount of time I was able to spend with my son because of the split households, so I tended to throw myself into my job. We all know that when one aspect of your life takes precedence, other aspects tend to suffer. I’m sure we’ve all known friends that have ‘disappeared’ once they started dating someone new. Their life eventually balances out and we start to hear from them again. But often for the first few months, they’re entirely wrapped up in the relationship.

The Newness of Being Single

The same thing happened to me, only in reverse. My relationship (marriage in my case) ended and I found myself suddenly living on my own, only having my son part-time and with quite a bit of idle time on my hands. What is a bachelor to do right after his divorce?

Dating was fun and exciting for me at first. In the beginning, I couldn’t wait for my Friday or Saturday night date night. I never scheduled dates during my time with my son, but being in a co-parenting situation allowed me to do this without many of the challenges solo parents experience. Of course, the newness didn’t take long to wear off and my date night excitement turned into fear and loathing. I needed a distraction from dating. My days and nights alone turned from exciting to lonely. I threw myself into my job, picked up a few new hobbies – mountain biking, writing and my website, just to name a few.

I finally had the time to discover myself just a bit. I felt I had lacked this time in the past and I was making up for some lost time in my early thirties. I enjoyed being single, having some freedom and the solitude and quiet of being alone. But I also struggled with it as well. Being single was like a shiny new toy; the problem is that it only stays shiny for a short amount of time.

Our Responsibilities as Parents

Once the shock and myriad of other emotions wore off after my divorce, I was able to re-center and re-focus myself on what really mattered the most – my son and my role as a dad and father to him.

My relationship with his mother didn’t work out the way we intended it to, but I was determined to maintain the presence in his life that I knew he’d need in a father. My parents divorced when I was young but my dad was a huge part of my life. Mothers may bear their children but fathers play an important role as well.

Dedicated Parent, Dedicated Provider

A (single) dad’s obligation to his children doesn’t stop when the ink is dry on the divorce papers. Far too many fathers seem to think divorce means freedom from parenting and responsibilities but that simply can’t be the case. Moving on with your life is fine and often required to heal from the ending of your relationship, but don’t leave your children behind. Till death do us part may not have worked out in your marriage but your children still depend on you to be them for them as a dad and as a father and provider.

More and more thirty and forty plus something’s are finding themselves back out on the romantic market than ever before.  This modern day dating phenomenon is partly due to the fact that the divorce rate hovers around fifty percent but also because more people are choosing to delay getting married until much later in life.

The dating dynamic has changed dramatically since the 1950’s and 60’s, but especially since the 70’s and 80’s with the emergence of online dating, social media sites and increasing evolution of what we call a family in today’s society.

My articles on “Divorced and Dating Again” aren’t just for divorced men and women that are entering back into the dating world – they’re also for singles in the dating world as well.  Singles also need to know the in’s and out’s of dating divorced singles. It’s almost inevitable if you’re dating over the age of thirty you’ll date someone that’s been previously married.

In “Divorced and Dating Again”, I hope to broach subjects that are thought about by many but spoken about by few.  We are the generations of open feelings, open communication and open minds.  Right?  Divorced and Dating will cover subjects that span the entire spectrum of divorce and dating from separation, divorce and taking that first big step, to first dates, sex, love, lust and infidelity.  I’ll also cover some hot topics for thirty plus daters like May-December romances, cougars, sugar daddy-sugar baby relationships and other dating situations unique to our stage in life.

Whew!  That’s quite a list!  We’ll get through it all, though – just you and me.

As always, if there’s a topic you’d like to discuss or you have a story you’d like to share with my readers or me, please feel free to contact me using the form on my site.

Dating and women are often two very confusing subjects in a guy’s life. Many would argue that if you’re a ‘nice guy,’ they are even more confusing. After all, we’ve all heard the adage “nice guys finish last.” However, many women and many ‘nice guys’ will tell you that the adage doesn’t necessarily hold true.

Today’s dating world is vastly different than that of previous times. How can a ‘nice guy’ survive in the dating world?

Here are some tips for survival in the jungle of dating and women.

Tip 1: Be yourself.

No matter what you think a woman wants, you’re always better off being yourself. You don’t have to lavish gifts on your date to make a good first impression and if you try to pretend you’re someone else, or feign expertise in an area she’s interested in, the best case scenario is that you’re going to be revealed as a fraud.

The worst thing that can happen is that you don’t get discovered and you have to continue faking throughout the affiliation. What kind of relationship is that?

Some men will pretend to be a bad boy because the woman they have a crush on is into rougher guys. I can’t think of anything more exhausting than having to put on a show every time you’re with someone.

If the woman you’re dating doesn’t like the real you, then she’s not the woman for you. The whole point of dating is to find someone who’s perfect for you, not to just hold onto any woman you date.

Tip 2: Don’t be afraid to speak your mind.

Although the conventional dating advice is to steer clear of politics, religion, and money, many people have dropped that advice.

Regardless of whether you go there, you definitely want to express your true opinions on things. This stands true for small things as well as the big three no-no topics. For example, don’t lie and say you like a type of food you actually hate. If she’s a vegetarian and you’re a carnivore, you can’t pretend to be vegan. You can’t even pretend that you’ve been thinking about becoming vegan. Why? It’s not going to work! And it will end up being a source of resentment for you.

Some people like to talk about big topics—like politics and religion—early on because they feel like you might as well know where the two of you stand from the get-go. No sense in getting emotionally wrapped up in someone now that you’re later going to wonder how you ever got together.

And just because you’re polar opposites doesn’t mean the whole thing is doomed. If she’s a vegan and you love steak, but she is fine with other people eating meat, then things might be fine. You never know.

Stifling your actual opinion about things is going to get you nowhere. She now has no idea who you really are, and you’re going to spend the night saying, ‘yeah!’ a lot. Not a promising start.

Tip 3: Show some chivalry!

Lots of men are afraid to show chivalry for women. Men have reported having women yell at them and accuse them of patronizing them. But a lot of women do appreciate some chivalry.

The big thing is to think about chivalry as respect. It doesn’t mean that you’re rescuing her or that she’s a damsel in distress. It means you’re showing some respect to the other person. It is kindness.

It also gives you a chance to see if she’s worth it.

That’s right: chivalry can and should run both ways. You can tell that a woman is worth it because she will return your gestures.

When you open the car door for her, she can unlock your door so it’s ready for you to open when you come around to the other side.

Sometimes women show chivalry in ways that we’ve traditionally just attributed to ‘how women act.’ But really, it’s the same thing as us being chivalrous. For example, does she bring you soup over when you’re sick with a cold? That’s chivalry too.

Maybe you send her flowers and she pops in with the DVD she knows you’ve been dying to get. Or she’s already Fandangoed the tickets to a film that just came out. That’s chivalry too.

Yes, men can show chivalry by offering our coat when she’s cold, holding the door open, and walking on the outside of the sidewalk, closer to the traffic. But hopefully she’ll respond with some chivalry of her own.

Tip 4: Cut back on alcohol as disaster prevention.

Alcohol and dating can be a disaster. Dating and women are confusing enough without adding impaired decision-making into the mix. In fact, there are studies showing that alcohol consumption negatively impacts the quality of the relationship.

Why?

Lots of reasons.

When you’re drinking, you’re louder than you normally are. You say things you would normally think, but not say. That’s not typically a good thing with someone you don’t know well.

Everyone seems prettier, funnier, sexier, smarter… just better when you’re drinking. That’s not a good thing either. You may end up dating someone much longer than you would’ve without alcohol.

The physical intimacy usually moves faster when there’s alcohol involved. At first, you may think, Hey, that’s good, right?

Wrong.

Sex makes everything more complicated. You could end up with all sorts of lingering consequences: unintended pregnancy, or stalker-level devotion from someone you may later realize you don’t really like much. Or both!

Cutting back on alcohol eliminates one more thing possibly going wrong on the date. Wouldn’t you rather be in control of what you say and do? Lots of people drink to “loosen up,” but nine times out of ten, we end up too loose.

You can win the dating and women game as a ‘nice guy.’ It can be done. Just follow these tips and you’re off to a good start.

Image credit: sonyaseattle via Flickr.