As you become a single parent for whatever reason, responsibility becomes a lot more difficult.
My story began the day my 6 year old son was born. The “sperm donor” (ie: father but not dad) of my son was absolutely positive he was going to help me take care of our son even though we were not together (thank God). Well, he did come see him at the hospital when he was born, but after that it was all down hill with him.
I told him he could call whenever he wanted to see my son. He had my phone number, so he could call or text, but did he EVER? You are absolutely correct if you guessed ‘hell no!’. He would see him for a day then decide not to call for a couple months at a time.
Eventually I was fed up with his lies and excuses, so I decided what was best for my son was just to cut all ties. I figured that was best but then my boyfriend (who’s been in my son’s life since he was a year and a half old), sat down and wanted to talk to me about my son’s father. He said,”I know you dont want to hear this, but I think you should give him a 2nd chance, considering my son was older now, and let him make a decision on what he thinks of his dad”.
I gave in and decided to call him after 3 years. I personally went inside to see how my son would react to seeing his father again. The 1st visit was excellent, my son was extremely happy to see him for the first time (again). Things were going well for awhile, then out of the blue he decided to stop calling and asking to see my son.
I was so angry at him because I feared this would happen again. My son was so upset and crying. He asked me everyday if he could see his dad. Of course I couldn’t bad mouth his dad in front of him, so I told him we had to wait and see if he called for him. Of course he didn’t until six months later on Christmas Day. The kicker? My son wanted nothing to do with him. My son told him to his face,”I don’t want to stay at your house dad, I want to stay with my mommy”. So he got back in the car with me and we went back home. My son never even received a gift from his father for Christmas that year, either.
In a way, I was so proud of my son because he made his first big boy decision on his own. On the other hand, I was sad that his father was choosing not to be involved in his life. I believe someday he will regret that decision.
Still to this day, his father only calls when it’s convenient for him, (which is 2 or 3 times a year). I believe in giving everybody a second chance, but when you abuse the priveledge, you face the consequences!